It was perhaps about eleven-thirty, when we left Mon Plaisir.

'What are you going to do?' I asked Alice, who certainly was not fit to drive, as we had shared a further half bottle of red wine. 'I haven't seen you this tipsy in years! You're rather unsteady on those heels too.' I'd never seen her out in black stilettos.

'Do you like the shoes, then?' I nodded. 'Now that I don't have to look down on you, I can be a bit taller!'

'I don't mind!' I smiled. 'They suit you. Just be careful as I don't want to have to take you to Casualty with a twisted ankle.'

'I'm OK!' She demonstrated by walking faster, but even more unsteadily.

'You can't go home in that state!' I then repeated my question. 'So what are you going to do?'

'I did suggest to Alistair, that I might not be home.' We were now walking separately and chastely a few feet apart to where she thought her car was parked behind the Shaftesbury Theatre. 'He knows how to look after the bassets. But they'll miss me!'

'Who's Alistair?' I was rather surprised, as his name had not been mentioned before.

'He's my lodger!' She giggled. 'He's a pupil in Chambers. Not mine as I don't do pupils! You're not jealous of my toy-boy are you?'

Of course I was jealous, but I didn't say. 'I'm still protective of you! But I doubt anybody as sensible as you, would ever end up with a toy-boy!'

'How do you know, I'm sensible? You can be such a prig! In other words you are jealous, aren't you?' She laughed and ran towards a dark blue Audi. 'He's younger than Josh! Six foot and more, dark, brown eyes, slim, intelligent, handsome, sexy! He's better than you in bed!' She leant on the front wing of the car and raised her skirt to show a knee, whilst flirting by rubbing one foot on the back of the other leg.

'I'm not jealous at all!' I wasn't sure whether she was telling the truth or just winding me up because of the drink!

She threw me her keys and I caught them. 'Open the car for me? I can't afford to be in control! You don't really drive now, so it won't matter to you!'

'Thanks!' I approached the passenger door of the car and put the key in the lock. I tried to turn it but nothing moved. It certainly didn't feel right. I tried the other key with no more success. 'Are these the correct keys?' I held them up for her to check.

'Yes!' She pointed to a red Audi a few cars down. 'But it's the wrong car!'

***

We didn't walk back to the hotel, as after retrieving a carrier with my suit, shirt and waistcoat from the car, I managed to hail a stray taxi. The driver wasn't too pleased at the short journey up Tottenham Court Road, but a sensible tip appeased him.

Once inside, I propped Alice against the reception desk. 'Do you have a suitable room for my drunken ex-wife?'

'I'm sorry, sir!' The receptionist waved his hands. 'We're completely full tonight! I could try one of the other hotels round here!'

I turned to Alice. 'You can have my floor, bath, easy chair or bed, if you like! Or I could put you in a taxi to Josh's!'

'No! He's putting up some friends, I think! I'll take your bed!' She smirked drunkenly at me! 'You can have something less comfortable!'

'But I'm paying, so surely I get first choice!'

'That's not like you!' She smiled at me. 'You usually give me the best seat or let me choose sides. You're quite sweet really!'

'But that was when we had a legal contract!' I smiled wickedly. 'Now, we're two free-thinking, equal adults. Things have changed a lot since we last shared a bed unmarried!'

***

'So this is home!' I opened the door to the room and pushed it back. 'Just one double bed, a chair, a television and a wardrobe. It's quite lonely, but it'll do until the end of the month!'

The lights were now on and Alice looked around the room. 'Cosy would be a kind word. It's lucky you're not as tall as Alistair. But it's surprisingly tidy for you! Where are the clothes on the floor?'

'Living by myself in hotel rooms for three months, has meant that I've had to reform!' I opened the mini-bar. 'Would you like a night cap? I've got a nice bottle of Paddy!'

'Am I to believe that you got that in for yourself?' She was sitting with her legs on the bed having discarded her stilettos on the floor. 'It's full!'

'I only bought it this afternoon!' I grabbed two glasses from above the mini-bar. 'It was on special offer!'

'A likely story!' She waved her hand. 'I'll have a small one with plenty of water!'

***

'If you think you're going to sleep with me and have sex, you can think again!' She had stood up and had removed her blouse and skirt to reveal a sensible white bra and black tights over a pair of equally sensible and very large flesh-coloured knickers.

'Where did you get those?' I pointed at the knickers. 'Alistair obviously has a fetish!'

'Marks! They are very comfortable.'

'I wouldn't want to sleep with you in those.' I reached in a drawer. 'Would you like one of my T-shirts. It'll be a bit big, but it'll keep you warm.

'Yes! Thanks!' She took it and marched towards the bathroom. 'If you can find a pillow for the middle of the bed, you can have the side farthest from the bathroom. But keep your pants on!'

That sounded like an acceptable compromise. 'Thanks!' I knew the bed had four pillows, so as I would only need one, there would be one for the middle.

***

I had rearranged the bed, undressed as instructed, taken my side and turned off most of the lights before Alice returned.

She had taken a long time to return. 'Your toothbrush was disgusting!' She had now climbed in on her side of the bed and was facing away from me. 'I had to give it a thorough cleaning, before I could use it!'

'Thank you!'

'Don't be sarcastic!' She raised her head to turn slightly towards me. 'Aren't you going to clean your teeth?'

'I suppose so!'